Can get quite boring and tedious. I often get distracted and start daydreaming and wonder why you have to live so far away. Why we can’t see each other. Why we can’t go driving around at night and look up at the stars. Why we can’t bake cupcakes together and cover each other in flour. Why you can’t be here to just hold me in your arms. Why we can’t sit together in a park and talk. Why I can’t gaze into your gorgeous blue eyes and become mesmerized as you play your guitar and sing for me.
And then I remember, it will happen eventually. I have a habit of wanting to rush things. Wanting everything to be in my timing, not caring if its what’s in everyone’s best interest. I’m really trying to get better at that. So for now, texting you until 4am, emailing, watching videos of you sing to me, Skyping, and calling each other is going to have to do. All of these things make it possible to deal with being apart. And when we do finally meet face-to-face, it’s going to be really hard for me to contain my emotions. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to feel when I’m finally with you. My face buried in your chest, you hugging me tight. I just can’t imagine the happiness I’ll feel.
So, this is me putting down the wall that I built to protect myself. To protect my heart. Whatever this turns out to be, I’m ready for the ride. And it’s safe to say there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you…❤ ❤
Babe, I’m almost positive its not normal to feel like this after knowing someone for such a short amount of time, but I just can’t help it. Spending all day talking to you about life and movies and books and cartoons and music just makes me happy. I can’t help but expect that this feeling won’t last forever. But I’m trying to be more optimistic in life, and you don’t seem like most guys, so maybe it will. I love hearing all about your different quirks and out-of-the-ordinary habits/interests. I love that you jam out to Fleetwood Mac in your car and text me cute song lyrics because you know I love them too. I love your corny jokes. Maroon 5. I love the intelligent conversations we have. I love that you’re actually mature. It’s cute that you have an odd hatred for peas. Those good morning texts. Those goodnight texts. I love that we have a list of things we want to do together, places we want to travel to, goals for the future. I love that whenever I hear that one Landon Pigg song, I immediately think of you and your guitar. I’m hoping you won’t read this since it makes me seem extremely clingy and weird, but I needed to write this somewhere. In the chance that you do read this, please don’t take it the wrong way. You make me happy and give me butterflies :3 Please don’t ever stop being you.
~ Jacqui ❤